7 things you can do to keep busy without other people
Welcome back to Happiness Weekly!
It’s been more than a year since I officially worked for a corporate kind of company
It’s been more than a year since I regularly wrote in my blog Happiness Weekly
I’ve been flat out!!
You’re probably wondering what I’ve been doing.
Before I get to that I want to tell you about a conversation with a colleague the other day.
“So, what are you up to after work?” the conversation went, it was a Saturday and I had a list of things I needed to do that I could wrap about the world five times.
“I don’t know…” they responded. “What are you doing?”
Raise your hand if you’re a “What are you doing?” person. You know, the one that goes from friend to friend “What are you doing? What are you doing? WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” until you finally find something you can do?
It’s really no way to live.
First of all, it depends on someone else for you to actually do something.
Second, it makes you appear desperate and needy.
Third, it will drive people away from you … mostly because you appear desperate and needy.
Having said that, I may have gone a little the other way with people saying “I never ask you out anymore because you’re always busy!” But you know what – I see the people I want to see and I always do what I want to do. Always. Literally. Every, single, day.
OK, so it’s good to be aware that you can go too far with this. But here’s how to find something you can do without relying on people.
- Find an interest
Notice I didn’t say “Find a hobby”? When I was starting out trying to find something to do people kept saying “Get a hobby!” And I’d draw a blank. “What? Like stamp collecting?” I didn’t see myself doing any of that stuff. I loved walking but not bushwalking in groups – I couldn’t imagine anything worse! So just simply find something you’re interested in.
- Do something positive
When I say do something positive, that may spark a heap of different ideas as opposed to sitting in front of Netflix. What’s more rewarding – watching TV or doing something for your community, and making new friends while you’re at it? So if you’re not doing anything else today, try to do something positive.
- Consider your next move in life
If there’s nothing left to do with the day, what are you doing next with your life? Are you forever going to stay in the job you’re in or the town you grew up in? What are you going to do to change things? Is it time to start applying for new jobs? What about planning a new trip? Life is an adventure – the only want you can make it adventurous is to plan and execute! Keep moving!
- Get out of town
You know, sometimes just taking yourself out of town to look at different scenery can be enough to inspire you towards a different path. How about you just pack a bag and take a drive somewhere different for the weekend – just you. Sounds daunting. Sounds boring. What will you do once you get there? Plan it once you get there! Think of it as local travelling – it’ll work out, you may even like it!
- Get future-focussed
Honestly, when my life feels like it’s going nowhere (it’s a feeling – turns out, it’s always going somewhere!), I have nothing to do and I’m losing faith on whether I’m on the right path or not. Or even when I’m just looking for some direction – I will either get a psychic reading or get some coaching – both of them tend to set me on a better path. “What if I get a bad reading?” A friend will say. “Wouldn’t you want to know now so you can at least prepare yourself for it?” Hells yes!
- Deal with it
Often when you’re “bored” or not sure what to do, you will also have a long list … that generally you’re avoiding. If it’s not grocery shopping, washing the car, cleaning the bathroom or some other chore – it’ll be some life event that keeps coming up. This is your opportunity to overcome self-sabotage and deal with the issue head on. Really think about what it is and then action it differently so you can start changing the outcome.
And although this relies on people, I’m going to throw it in anyway:
- Contact a friend you haven’t seen for a while
Contact someone who you haven’t seen for a loooong time. Preferably someone who lives out of town (about 1.5 hours away or more). Just have a chat to them about what they’ve been up to and see if that leads them to say “We should catch up!” It may get you out of town one weekend … if it doesn’t, you may need to review your friends. See, you’re still not asking that dreaded question “What are you doing?”
Meanwhile I promised to update you with what I’ve been doing. For the past year, I’ve been running a company called Relationship Free where I assisted people to recover from toxic and abusive relationships. It was going well when it came time to expand. Not long ago, as many of you know, I was in an abusive relationship and I not only got myself out of there, I also recovered and now I’m helping other people with everything I know.
The thing is, I recently realised two things recently: for the past year – I’ve still been hiding. I’ve been too scared to put anything under my name because I didn’t want him to find me. I’m over that fear now. And the second thing is, there’s so much more to me and how I can help people than a domestic violence relationship. I mean, I’ve lost 20kg in my time, I’ve overcome terrible stints with depression, I’ve had a successful business in music – working with some of Australia’s top bands … and the list goes on. All because of me!
As I can contribute a lot more, I’ve decided to expand MORE! Happiness Weekly will become my life coaching channel – this blog will continue. So will all the associated social media (sorry to the person who wanted to use that). I’m releasing a book shortly … I know, I’ve been saying this for a long time – but it’s not an eBook – I’m hoping to actually have it published!
Relationship Free will also be a product under the overall brand. So I’m still going to assist people with their recovery from toxic and abusive relationships. I still my mission that I want to reduce global suicide rates and homicide statistics associated with domestic violence … a program to assist this mission is also in the works!
AND! I’m now adding a new element which is my business coaching. Over the past year, I had a lot of people come to me for business coaching, although I “specialised” in relationships. I’ve help people find new work, make BIG business decisions and build their business to be a thriving success. I’ve also helped people make scary entrepreneurial decisions. Interestingly, the feedback I had about the business coaching was most positive. So I decided to add it as an option.
There’s SO much to tell you! The new brand, new website and an official release is coming soon! It’s all in the works right now! Stay tuned! xx
Photo via VisualHunt.com